During the Pardoner's prologue, he reiterates that he does not truly care about his parishioners' souls; rather, he only cares about money, which is ironic because he claims to only teach a sermon on one topic: radix malorum est cupiditas (the love of money is the root of all evil). This, of course, works to his advantage since he shames his listeners into giving him their money. After acknowledging he is "a wholly vicious man" (219), the Pardoner warns against the vices of drinking and swearing before beginning his tale with three young "rioters" sitting in a bar drinking before the church bells have even rung on a Sunday morning. As they are sitting there, they hear the bell of a coffin passing by and inquire as to who died. The boy working at the bar claims it was a friend of theirs and that Death killed him, and the barkeeper confirms the boy's story. Enraged by this news, the rioters make a pact to kill Death and storm off into the woods to find him. On their way, they meet an old man and ask him why he hasn't died yet (since he's so old). After the old man berates the rioters for their rudeness toward the elderly, they accuse him of being a spy for Death and threaten to hurt him if he doesn't tell them where Death is. The man replies that Death is beneath a tree toward a nearby grove, and the rioters head off to find him. When they get to the tree, however, all they find is a pile of gold. Of course, quite forgetting their original intent, the young men devise a plan to get the money home safely. Since they are not exactly the most upstanding citizens, one of the rioters suggests they draw lots to see who has to get supplies for the day. The youngest rioter draws the shortest straw and has to go to town. Once the youngest is gone, the others scheme a plan to murder him upon his return by one pretending to wrestle the younger one while the other stabs him in the back. The youngest, however, also plans to murder the other two when he returns by adding poison to the wine of the other two. When he returns the other two attack him and murder him. Then, as they are rather parched, the other two drink of the poison cup, and they all truly find "Death" beneath the tree. After his tale, the Pardoner shares that he has holy relics the other passengers may wish to buy. He also asserts that the others are lucky to have him around so he may pardon them after each town and, if one were to die, he could pardon their sins on their deathbed. He asks the other pilgrims to seek his pardon for a small fee and suggests that the Host goes first since he is "the most enveloped of [them] all in sin" (257). The host, however, is not amused and tells the Pardoner, "I wish I had your ballocks in my hand/ Instead of relics in a reliquarium;/ Have them cut off and I will help to carry 'em./ We'll have them shrined for you in a hog's turd" (257). Finally, the Knight, witnessing the conversation turn rude, encourages the Host and Pardoner to kiss and make up, and the pilgrims continue on their way.